Domestic disturbance calls

[DancingLady]

When someone calls the police on their neighbors, how often is there an actual situation where intervention was needed? Is it fairly common for these calls to be well meaning neighbors who misunderstood what they were hearing?

 

[lushlala]

Lord knows. Sometimes you just don't know what to do for the best. But I know of a situation where all the people concerned were left left red faced, when a well meaning elderly neighbour, fearing for the woman next door's life, called the police because she thought she heard a God almighty, vicious fight erupting between man and wife. As it turns out, her neighbours were not having a vicious fight at all, but were rather engaged in very highly animated "amorous" activities and very vocally expressive sex!

 

[dyanmarie25]

Lord knows. Sometimes you just don't know what to do for the best. But I know of a situation where all the people concerned were left left red faced, when a well meaning elderly neighbour, fearing for the woman next door's life, called the police because she thought she heard a God almighty, vicious fight erupting between man and wife. As it turns out, her neighbours were not having a vicious fight at all, but were rather engaged in very highly animated "amorous" activities and very vocally expressive sex!

Hahaha. That is hilarious though I think both the neighbor and the husband and wife were real embarrassed. That's why it's not always good to jump to conclusions right away or even assume. But yeah, maybe the elderly woman became paranoid anf the first thing thay came to her mind was to call the cops.

 

[Diane Lane]

That's funny, I wonder if it was a new relationship, so was the first time the neighbor had heard it? It helps when you're in a stable neighborhood, where people stay a while, so you can get to know them. That way, you know what to expect, and recognize different signs/sounds/activities. It always amazes me when I'm watching crime shows (based on real cases) how often people in the neighborhood, or otherwise familiar with the couple, know what's going on, but don't intervene.

 

[JoanMcWench]

It really depends on whether you see something or whether you're just hearing it. The police investigate either way but I like to know for certain before anything. Seeing as there are those occasions where it backfires on you. In the same vein there are circumstances where you called & there was an issue yet the person being assaulted chooses not to press charges. Can't help those uninterested in helping themselves.

 

[DancingLady]

It really depends on whether you see something or whether you're just hearing it. The police investigate either way but I like to know for certain before anything. Seeing as there are those occasions where it backfires on you. In the same vein there are circumstances where you called & there was an issue yet the person being assaulted chooses not to press charges. Can't help those uninterested in helping themselves.

Choosing not to press charges doesn't necessarily mean the victim does not want to help themselves. The fact that someone called the police might get their attention that they need to separate from their abuser. You can choose to protect yourself by leaving and getting to a safe place but still show mercy to that person.

 

[Gabe]

In the case of neighbors calling I think if it has happened a number of times then you can assume it is a domestic violence case. My friend regularly has the police around as both her and her husband have called the police on each other and their neighbors too, so the police have a record of the address and people involved.

Still, if a party chooses not to press charges (as my friend did) then all they do is keep returning until maybe there is no chance to press charges and she is in a body bag.

 

[tanker]

Well it is better to be safe then sorry. You might be a little red faced if you call the police by mistake, but that is a lot better as opposed to not calling the police and then later finding out that someone has been killed or something worse. Most reports to the police are usually false alarms, but it is better to err on the side of safety.

 

[lushlala]

That's funny, I wonder if it was a new relationship, so was the first time the neighbor had heard it? It helps when you're in a stable neighborhood, where people stay a while, so you can get to know them. That way, you know what to expect, and recognize different signs/sounds/activities. It always amazes me when I'm watching crime shows (based on real cases) how often people in the neighborhood, or otherwise familiar with the couple, know what's going on, but don't intervene.

Diane, not sure if it was a new relationship but they were new in the area LOL

It is truly scary how nowadays people will turn a blind eye to what's going on because they just "don't want any trouble". My sister was just telling me recently that a few years ago while I was living abroad, she was held at knife point, in broad daylight for the sake of a very modest phone. Not that a more posh one justifies their actions, of course. She says she saw people coming and thought they'd help, but sadly none of them bothered and in fact, when they realised what was taking place, deliberately diverted altogether! It's sad.

 

[calicer1996]

Majority of the cases usually end peacefully without any press charges whatsoever. Usually the neighbors, in order to show who's the boss (ego?), threaten to call the police. It does not work that way people. SMH

 

[Sunflogun]

So true, many times neighbors disagree on something and they call the police when in fact all that would be needed would be that the neighbors acted as adults and rationally reach an agreement. The police has better things to do in many of those cases.

 

[Diane Lane]

Some places (I believe it started in California, here in the States) have changed the law, so that if there is any sign of abuse, such as scratches, bruises, blood, etc., one or both parties will be arrested. The state is the one standing in stead of the victim, so as to remove the onus from him/her, since turning the abuser in often results in repercussions. I don't know the statistics of whether this has helped to decrease repercussions, but my understanding is that was the logic for changing the law.

 

[genevb]

If you call for domestic disturbance and you're wrong, does the police fine you for false alert?

 

[JoanMcWench]

Choosing not to press charges doesn't necessarily mean the victim does not want to help themselves. The fact that someone called the police might get their attention that they need to separate from their abuser. You can choose to protect yourself by leaving and getting to a safe place but still show mercy to that person.

I'm speaking specifically to repeat offenders. At a certain point (because it's human nature), the people calling stop calling as often & the police coming to the scene can only do so much. Because, again, you cannot help those uninterested in helping themselves. Calling to create distance from this person is a great first step but shouldn't be the only step.

 

[bala]

If you call for domestic disturbance and you're wrong, does the police fine you for false alert?

The first time they might just let you go but if you are a repeated offender they surely will get a hold of you and fine you.Don't take this as a test,because some cops are real hard even if you are a first time offender.